


Don’t Panic Unless Sean is Driving the Spaceship

by dapatty



Category: Bandom, Cobra Starship, Empires (Band), Fall Out Boy
Genre: Action/Adventure, Alternate Universe - Fusion, Drinking, Feelings, Gen, Max Steger can be a little rain cloud on occasion, Werewolves, Werewolves in Space
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-24
Updated: 2015-02-24
Packaged: 2018-03-14 21:16:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,303
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3425897
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dapatty/pseuds/dapatty
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>#10 Max Steger (gen or any pairing), hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy</p>
            </blockquote>





	Don’t Panic Unless Sean is Driving the Spaceship

**Author's Note:**

> It’s totally like hitchhiker’s guide, except werewolves. Okay, it’s vaguely inspired by HG2G, like they share a towel, but mainly werewolf pack in space. 
> 
> Anyway, that’s how Max ended up having pancakes with President Wentz and Supreme Android Stump.

Max should have just rolled over and gone back to sleep when Sean and Tom crash-landed in his backyard again. Up to that point, he’d almost say that he missed them a little. (Okay, really. If he was being perfectly honest. He mainly only missed Steegs. Not having his sister around to drag him out of the house had actually kinda been a bummer.) 

Sure, those two werewolves were his best friends. But really, he just liked being home. His neighborhood didn’t have pesky things like dealing with full moons on a starship instead of outside under the stars or accidental interplanetary incidents because someone sneezed at the wrong time (Sean, it’s always Sean.). 

He shouldn’t have been surprised at all when he found out why they were back _and yet_.

“Where’s my sister?” Max asked.

Tom’s shoulders drooped and Sean said, “So about that.”

“Did you lose my sister? Are you seriously about to tell me that you lost part of my family?!?” Max thought of killing Sean. And maybe Tom too, for good measure. “You better have a good explanation for this.”

“We do!” Sean nodded and reached out, squeezed Max’s shoulder, giving his best reassuring face.

“Yeah,” Tom sighed. “She was kidnapped by the President of the Galaxy.”

“Well, kidnapped is such a strong word,” Sean countered, rambling like it’s his job. “More like whisked off on his really snazzy starship. She might have lost a bet. And President Wentz is _oddly_ persuasive. Or maybe it’s just because he’s so chatty. Almost smooth. Lots of stuff all at once about him.”

“Sean, shut up,” Tom said, punching his arm. “You aren’t helping our case.”

“Why are you idiots here and not saving my sister?” Max asked. 

“Full moon,” Sean explained. “Besides dude. She’s _your_ sister. _You_ should totally be the one to help get her. Come on! Tom has never looked this hangdog about anything. Not even that time with the robots.”

“Just let me get a clean towel,” Max sighed deeply. “As if I could leave it to you two.”

“You’ve always been my favorite!” Sean pointed at him triumphantly.

Max thought he heard Tom muttering something that sounded very much like, “But I thought _I_ was your favorite.”

****

Max hadn’t missed space travel. Maybe it should have been kind of fantastic, but it lacked something. Like, wind or proper noise, instead of just stars streaking by the window and the hum of the contented engine. It was all too Starship Enterprise and not enough Starship Troopers or something.

He’d been back with the pack for a month and the only lead involved The Cobras. Gabe was still, unfortunately, hands everywhere. 

“Matthew, Maxie, _Max_ ” Gabe crooned, hand snaking back down toward Max’s ass.

Sean growled. Tom reached up and squeezed the back of Sean’s neck. Max felt grateful, but also a little pissed off. Sean better not pee on him again while shifted. Max was not actually property, what even Sean?!

“Gabe, back off,” Tom said, frowning.

“Honey, we can’t be so handsy with Steeg’s little brother in front of these territorial smartasses,” Vicky T said, sliding up to Gabe’s side and maneuvering him away from Max. Vicky had _always_ been his favorite.

“But his hair is so fluffy,” Gabe protested, wrapping an arm around her.

“Look, after that Ian kid and the rest of our little band of miscreants, we’ve met our hair quota babe.” Vicky patted Gabe on his cheek. 

“I suppose,” Gabe sighed. 

“Why are we even talking to them again?” Sean asked, only the slight amount of growl in his voice as he herded Max behind Tom.

“Because we know where Wentz and his crew were headed,” Nate chimed in.

“Fantastic,” Sean agreed. “Be with the telling now and then get going.”

“But you said you’d buy us a round,” Gabe said, pouting dramatically.

One round turned two and well, _several_. Max thought that maybe he’d be hungover the rest of the month. Maybe even hungover the rest of forever. Travie’s space brew had that kind of quality. For instance, he couldn’t remember Travie showing up, but he’d arrived with Walker at some point. They were both huddled around a carafe of coffee, looking more asleep than awake.

“You know Gabe is playing you, right?” Travie asked after Max ambled over to their table. 

“I’m pretty sure Gabe and our dear President _are a thing_ ,” Max said, pouring himself a mug of coffee and just breathing in the steam for a minute. “So sure, in fact, that I’m positive Gabe is a distraction so that Pete can trick my sister into some sort of public office.”

“Hey, somebody’s gotta actually run things,” Travie allowed. “Steegs is a badass who’d be good for the galaxy.”

“Yeah,” Max agreed, feeling a pang in his chest. His sister was more than awesome, but he still missed her. If she ended up running the galaxy, he was pretty sure he’d see her even less than he does now. Shit, he’d have to make more of an effort to actually visit if she took over. Something like _actually going on adventures on purpose_. He shuddered at the thought. 

“You know your pack misses you too?” Travie asked. “To the point of moping even. It’d be pathetic, but it’s kind of sweet. They left you alone for as long as they could.”

“I know that too,” Max sighed. 

“They haven’t been this happy in a while is what I’m saying,” Travie said, pointedly.

“Man, I get it,” Max held up his hands. “I really do. I missed them too, but space was just too much and they seemed happy without me bumming them out.”

“Do I really have to give you the ‘Stop Being a Dumb Werewolf’ talk?” Walker asked. Max startled. He’d been pretty sure that Jon had fallen back to sleep.

“No,” Max frowned. 

“So you’ll stop being a dumb werewolf and hang out with your pack?” Jon asked.

“Probably,” Max hedged. “I’ll think about it after we find Steegs.”

“Think about it now, boo,” Travie suggested topping off their mugs. 

They really needed to catch up with Danielle. Like a month ago. Before feelings were something any of them were thinking about.

****

For a search that had seemed so involved, finally running up on Steegs landed on the side of anti-climatic. She’d been waiting for them when they docked at the capital planet.

“Heard you guys were looking for me,” she said, crossing her arms over her chest. 

“Yeah,” Tom said while Sean scuffed his boot on the sidewalk looking everywhere but Danielle. 

“Oh you are fucking kidding me!” Max said and stepped forward, wrapping his sister in a hug. She hugged him back just as tightly. “They made you mad enough to entertain thoughts of being part of the shadow government. I can’t believe it.”

“Yeah,” Steegs answered. “But hey. It got you out of the house.”

“ _Hey,_ ” Max protested. “Rude.”

“I’m your sister and I know best when I say that you should leave your room for more than smokes and seeing the occasional show,” she said, punching his arm.

Max sighed deeply. 

“Yeah, yeah,” he grumbled, fighting a smile. He’d really missed her. 

“Now, as for you two,” Steegs turned her attention to Tom and Sean.

“I’m sorry,” Tom said. “You know. For _stuff_.”

“Good,” Steegs said then lifted an eyebrow at Sean.

“I’m also sorry,” Sean hedged. “For _other stuff_.”

“You’re both buying me and my brother breakfast for this mess,” Steegs said, looping her arm with Max’s and turning heel toward the restaurant district. 

“Of course,” Tom agreed, catching up and taking Danielle’s free hand.

“Least we could do,” Sean said, falling into step with Max, smiling widely. 

Anyway, that’s how he ended up having pancakes with President Wentz and Supreme Android Stump.


End file.
